Post Walk Bliss

We LOVE Dogs in Costumes!

Yesterday Roxie was lounging in her overstuffed easy chair and Trav was sprawled out on the floor. Tilly was doing her own thing. I reached up in the closet and pulled out last year's Halloween costumes. Travis has his lions mane that just slips over his head and matches his golden fur perfectly and Roxie has a Tigger costume. Tilly's rock and roll girl dress is MIA but I am now thinking she needs some sort of cat costume in keeping with our group theme. Roxie's ears perked up the minute she saw her costume. She leapt to the ground and raced over to me. Travis started prancing and pacing. These dogs LOVE dressing up! If one of them is wearing a costume and the other isn't the dog without clothes will jealously attempt to rip the others dogs costume off! Unfortunately Tilly is the only one who doesn't like being dressed and she is the one who is easiest to fit. If she liked wearing clothes I would have buy her dozens of outfits, but no, her sweaters end up chewed off and hidden in the backyard. I kind of want to dress her up as a lobster. I have no idea why I am drawn to this except that I think she would make a cute lobster. We have a whole month to try on costumes and have fun before the big day. Don't you worry! Pictures are coming soon!

Other People's Dogs

I admit it- I sometimes jump to conclusions about other people and their dogs. I have a client who has a very young Australian Shepherd. I have been in their home twice and the dog was always outside by himself casting longing looks indoors at the family. Any time I see a dog on its own outside my heart always breaks a little. If they have a companion dog not so much, but if they are all by their little lonesome I feel sad and my internal dialogue looks something like this- "Why did they get a dog if they don't want to spend time with it? Don't they know that dogs are pack animals and not meant to be alone?" By the way as I am typing this Travis is lying next to me has farted loudly. AND IT IS NOT the smell of fresh cut daisies. I was in their home again recently and gazing through the door at his beautiful blue eyes when I mentioned that I would love to meet him. After I finished their massages I walked into the main room and was met by some alert style barking. Then this beautiful 11 month old animal cautiously approached me and sniffed my hand. He then apparently decided I was okay because at this point he full body lunged at me and and proceeded to try to stick his tongue down my throat. I backed up and sat down and he followed me maintaining his full contact style of affection. I rubbed him down and gave him hugs ignoring the searing burn of claws ripping a slight tear in my right arm. Suddenly I realized they probably put him outside to spare me from this enthusiastic greeting! Fair enough. We then talked about the agility training they wanted to get for him and training they had gotten for him so far. These people do indeed love their dog- they just have to do a certain amount of damage control. I totally love his dog. I will take a full body hug and a kiss complete with scratches anytime!

Plastic in the Poo....

Today on our walk Roxie forced me to have a contemplative moment. She was making her second number 2 and I was about to clean it up when I noticed it had an unusual sheen. Great. I leaned in closer to examine it bracing myself carefully. The last time I leaned over and let my guard down she lunged at a passing truck and I wound up flat on my back with the wind knocked out of me. What's this? Roxies poop is coating a shiny piece of cellophane of some sort. Like the kind that is over packages of cigarettes. Obviously I know she hasn't started smoking but as I add this little gem to my collection of full poop bags I speculated on where she could have come across this and why should would have eaten it. My dogs are incredibly well fed and eating plastic wrap seems, well.... a little desperate. More like the behavior of some cracked out poodle or a spastic min pin. We kept going and about this time we are rounding the block and passing St. Pius. As luck would have it my Pandora station (which is broadcasting publically over my cell phone speaker) starts blaring a song where the lyrics state "i'm da baddest bitch in dis club." I am often shocked when I hear unedited songs on Pandora, because apparently I don't get out much and have no idea what these songs actually say. Of course this song is pretty conservative. The ones that shock me usually involve a man giving a woman detailed instructions on what to do with his penis. Using less technical language of course. Anyway this wouldn't have been a big deal except right at this moment a little old lady was walking past us towards the church. I started praying she was deaf or had been a prostitute in a past life so perhaps this wouldn't be shameful and awkward. "Sweet doggies!" She chortled as she walked past me and the next song started- a persuasive argument for everyone to take shots. (vodka- not flu or pneumonia, where is Weird Al when you need him?) Note to self- change Pandora station on that block. Something virtuous like Amy Grant or some kind of nun station. Until tomorrow!

My Dogs Are Enabling Me!

I try to eat healthy. I really, really do. BUT- deep inside me is the strong compulsion to be a super fatty and eat anything fried or choc full of sugar. While living alone is helpful because it spares me the temptation of the unhealthy foods another person might choose to keep around- I swear these dogs have a master plan to keep me plus sized forever. This morning I had two clients cancel on me, so suddenly I have free time. I have also been contemplating starting a juicing cleanse. Okay, truthfully I was going to start one today but everyone knows cleanses should always be started on a Monday. Which is tomorrow. Plus there is food in the house that will either have to be eaten or pitched before I can successfully cleanse because as I am sure you know, the success of a cleanse depends on the banishment of any and all tempting food hiding in your kitchen. Which means I have a strawberry single serving cake mix that needs to go as well as an open carton of potato leek soup I need to finish off. So with this in mind I stirred up the cake mix and popped it in the oven and then I ran to the store for soup crackers to enjoy with my soup. After all, this is my last meal before two weeks of eating rehab via a juice only lifestyle. I search for a bra so no retail clerks would be scarred by my breasts roaming free, blow a kiss to the pups and then hop in my car. Travis, my big boy, seventy pounds of golden, furry beauty stops me dead in my tracks with a single look. His eyes say it all. Breakfast. From. McDonalds. I turn away quickly and try to avoid his penetrating gaze. But his eyes haunt me as I pick out the crackers for my soup. My maternal guilt kicks in so I pick up some chicken dental chews for the babies. I am checking out and headed home when my car suddenly goes into autopilot and is careening madly towards one of two McDonalds drive through lanes. Is there a remote control being operated by a canine craving sausage? I think there is! I order pancakes for me and sausage biscuits for my three furry children. Damn it! Healthy intentions foiled again. But tomorrow the kitchen will be empty except for produce so if I don't leave the house I should be fine. For now, I am going to watch three happy dogs gulp down a delicious sausage biscuit while I lick syrup off my fingers and google codependency with your dog. Sigh...